Doctor Psychobabble

“I thought I had paid for everything. Not like the woman pays and pays and pays. No idea of retribution or punishment. Just exchange of values. You gave something up and got something else. Or you worked for something. You paid some way for everything that was any good.”

- From “The Sun Also Rises” by Ernest Hemingway

I just got home from a long day at the hospital. Today was not a great day. But it was not a horrible day, either. And I am beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Pun intended.

It took me about 5 minutes to find a tongue depressor today. But that’s down from 10 minutes to find a bag of normal saline last week. So, in the vein of my chronic optimism, that’s something to be happy about.

I’m slowly starting to get the hang of inpatient internal medicine…the EMR system…the bathroom codes…the nurses…and all of those small random things, which actually have a huge impact on my overall functionality.

Life does get better. And as the above quote implies, all great things come at some cost. And being a great doctor is in fact a great thing.

I took the above photo through the hospital window last week. I am attempting to continue my “video/photo a day” goal for 2011. So far I have managed to take a video or photo every day. I pause. Even though pausing is the lowest item on my list every day. Pausing brings me perspective. And perspective brings me peace.

I shared this photo with a patient today. He told me that it was the best thing he’d seen in quite sometime. He smiled and thanked me for bringing a little bit of beauty and joy into his day. His words brought me incredible joy.

Words worth working for.

It has taken me quite some time to get past the tekmological difficulties of posting this video. But finally, I have conquered.

Click the image below to view my “Pause” video. It all started out with the idea of pausing for 3 seconds every day to take a video. Eventually, it turned into taking photos as well. I missed some days here and there. I was tempted to cheat and use photos or videos which were not taken on a certain day. But I did not.

So, here it is. My “2010 Video/Photo a Day” project. This is what 2010 meant to me. I came, I saw, I paused.

Enjoy!

I have brought back my “2010 Video a Day Project.” Yes, I missed some days here and there. And I decided to turn it into “any kind of 3 second daily pause,” including photos as well. I am trying to upload it somewhere besides Youtube, but I am having some technical difficulties. So enjoy this for the time being!

On January 1st of this year, I began a video project, the goal of which was to stop, pause and take a video for at least 3 seconds every single day. Unfortunately, I ended up falling behind and missing some days here and there. At first, I was going to scrap the project altogether, but then I realized that I’m not perfect, life’s not perfect, and this video project need not be perfect.

The concept behind this experiment is that by forcing oneself to stop and pause for three seconds every day, one comes three steps closer to enlightenment. Or something.

Anyway, for now, I have basically just turned the video clips into a collage, in reverse order, with music. But I have some other creative ideas a’brewin, as well.

Enjoy!