Words Like Violence

January 5, 2013, 9:15 amDr. Psychobabble4 comments

“Words like violence
Break the silence
Come crashing in
Into my little world
Painful to me
Pierce right through me
Can’t you understand
Oh my little girl

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm”

- Lyrics to “Enjoy the Silence” by Depeche Mode

Phone Home

It’s 9:00 a.m. on a Saturday morning. I just got home from working 24 hours at the hospital and on call. I went to work yesterday quite sick, not sure if I would make it through my shift. But alas, by the grace of caffeine and cold meds, I did.

I enjoyed my overnight time the most. I met president Obama’s cousin (he was white), who was also apparently a secret ops agent working in conjunction with the CIA. He asked me to palpate his lymph nodes.

I also met a young woman who was attempting to attack other patients on the inpatient psychiatric unit. I ended up having to order a STAT injection for her. Once she realized that I was the doctor responsible for her being medicated against her will, she unleashed her anger (rightfully so) upon me. She wanted to beat me to a pulp. She screamed a long stream of obscenities and threats of violence at me.

It got me thinking. I don’t mind when patients curse at me and threaten me. I don’t even mind when they attempt to physically hurt me. There is always a valid reason in their minds to do so. It’s also a part of my job. Which also got me thinking. There are not tons of jobs where someone gets paid to take verbal and physical abuse on a daily basis. Perhaps correctional officers? S&M slaves? McDonalds workers? Is there a common thread?

I actually think there is a part of me, which kind of appreciates the intensity and anger. Perhaps I actually need to experience that level of anger in some way. Maybe it’s cathartic. The moments of violence punctuate the otherwise mundane daily routines. I’m not sure. But I do know that my skin is thick when it comes to my patients. I’ve been called more horrible names than many people might ever in their life. And I’m more than okay with it.

It’s time to sleep. Enjoy the Silence.

Photo: Taken on my walk home from the hospital this morning.

Part of My “Yo Brooklyn, Fuhgeddaboudit” Photo Series

  • Eng. Patient

    Thanks! I shall bear this in mind for when You start to get on my nerves ; )

    • http://doctorpsychobabble.com Dr. Psychobabble

      yes, please do! ;)

  • Tom

    Hey Moms, In the hospitality industry, we don’t deal with this on a daily basis (hopefully), but we do occasionally deal with people yelling at us about stuff that we may or may not have had any control over. What I’ve read about this and experienced myself is that there are different types of “thick skin”.

    One type of “thick skin” is when people just don’t care what others think. This is actually pretty uncommon, more often people pretend they don’t care and hold their tears until they are alone. That’s not really a good way to handle criticism when you’re in a people oriented profession.

    Another type is when you care in general (with your friends, family, and possibly co-workers), but are callous and indifferent toward the patients, customers, or clients you interact with. Essentially this requires that you regard your patients, customers, or clients as less-than-you (possibly even less-than-human) so that you can dismiss their opinions as being stupid and unworthy. This is another not-so-good kind of “thick skin” but is all to often and unfortunately the type of thick skin that people in people oriented careers develop.

    A third kind is when you actually do care what people think and feel, but less about what they say, and you realize that there is a difference. When someone says, “You guys are stupid.” they are indicating frustration with something that they believe should be handled differently than what seems to have happened in their case. In fact the “you” isn’t necessarily even directed at you. “You” can be a stand-in for what is perceived as a faceless bureaucracy, even though you are trying to act as the face. So when someone yells at us, we don’t have to take it personally. Instead we can try to discover what the problem really is (possibly just by putting ourselves in the other person’s place). And when we do that, we can actually fix the problem. Interestingly, most of the time, when the person who had been irate thanks you for your help and praises you for your insight, they won’t even apologize for the unkind thing they said before because in their minds it was never about you anyway, so we shouldn’t make the negativity about us.

    • http://doctorpsychobabble.com Dr. Psychobabble

      AMEN!!!

      i guess that would def put me in the third category, at least with regards to my patients, and many times with other folks as well.

      i miss you!

      love,
      mom